Wednesday, September 3, 2014

Mission: Unbeatable Mom 4 - Kelly Bias, Mom of 4 Boys ALL under age 5!



The Bias family always wanted a big family – and getting one was a miracle (four, actually!). 

After trying to get pregnant for three years, they needed some good news in their lives. According to Kelly Bias, “We knew we always wanted to be parents together and wanted to raise our children together and that it didn't really matter to us how the children joined our family.” 

Along came William (44 months) and James (20 months). 

Kelly and her husband, Drew, had just started their first IVF cycle when they began the foster adoption process through Sierra Forever Families. They fostered William and James for more than a year until all the details were figured out with th

e courts and their biological family. Kelly said that, when she and Drew met the boys for the first time, they had an hour of playtime together. "It was like seeing your child for the first time; at least that is how my heart felt. In Sept 2013, they became our LEGAL children; they were always my children but a paper now made it official.”

After their family grew from two to four, Kelly said she and Drew wanted to try once more for an even bigger family. After so many failed IVF treatments and disappointments that they could never have children of their own, Kelly and Drew left their family’s fate up to God and tried one more time. 
“We tried IVF one last time after my 35th birthday,” Kelly said. “We knew it was now or never. We had never had good news when it came to fertility...always bad news. So when this cycle was comprised of all the same medicines, cycles, etc, I didn't have much hope. I was very happy with our family and knew that if this didn't work out, we would choose adoption again to grow our family.”

Well, that’s something they did not have to do. They chose for doctors to insert two embryos, even against their fertility specialist’s warning: “You will have twins if I put two embryos in, but I know you don't believe me.” They didn’t. 

But God had another plan. 

Kelly got pregnant, and “that is how we were blessed with two little miracle babies, Wyatt and Elijah, in November 2013 (at 29 weeks gestation). Eighteen months after bringing the big boys home we were parents to 4 young boys!”

Four young boys. Wow. All under the age of five. BIG Wow. "The days go quickly, the nights seem long," Kelly said of having four boys. "We don't know what it is to have one baby or one child, or even three for that matter! We know two and four and I wouldn't change it for anything." 

In addition to having four children and all the work entailed with that - (fortunately they have a lot of help from both of their moms, as well as a nanny) - Wyatt and Elijah were born under 3 lbs and were in the NICU for the first six weeks of their lives. 
The stress began. For Wyatt, it ended pretty quickly as he did really well through hospitalization at birth and has been healthy since.

Elijah's medical problems, on the other hand, grew worse after heading home from the NICU. He developed chronic lung disease as a result of prematurity, and spent three months in the PICU undergoing tests and procedures. He was diagnosed with central apnea, meaning has about 80 episodes of sleep apnea a night. "Thankfully we no longer need the bipap machine to care for him, and now he just requires oxygen while sleeping," Kelly said. "It has been tremendously stressful...all the uncertainty, not knowing what is wrong with him and if he will ever outgrow it..." 

In our opinion, this mom NEEDS a day out all to herself. How often does she get some time away?
"Honestly, never. I have so much guilt about even running errands after work (she works as a full-time Nurse Anesthetist at UCDavis Medical Center) because I won't have much time at home with the big boys before they go to bed."

She and Drew rarely have time alone together, and outings with girlfriends can sometimes span months. 
"It would mean a lot to me to have a day to recharge my battery," Kelly said. "I have a very stressful and demanding job, four small kids and one with special needs. I feel a little bankrupt of energy for myself. It would be so nice to have a day alone with friends and not worry about what is going on at home." 
Kelly said she has tremendous support from family and friends and feels a bit guilty raising money and spending it ALL on herself. SO...we are going to raise just enough for her special day out, and the rest will go to Sierra Forever Families - "the foster adopt program that helped bring the boys to us!"

In our opinion, no amount is too much, since any funds we raise that surpass our goal of $500 will go to charity ;) 

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