I took my boys to a Children’s Museum yesterday and I’m still confused. And mad. And, well, just plain confused.
So here’s what happened. There’s a really neat outdoor area to this museum with lots of things for kids to do – a water feature, some pipes for building and balls for rolling, a garden planted and maintained by children, etc. They have giant bubble-making wands that I was using to make big bubbles for Evan to chase around. Just then, a little blond boy walked up to me, and then another, and then their dad. “Twins?” I asked. “Triplets,” he said, with a shortness that added, “and don’t comment about it.” So I didn’t. Wow, I thought. I can’t even imagine.
Sure enough, there was the third little blond boy across the play area…with his fingers stuck in the door that leads into the indoor play area. He was screaming. The dad, who had scooped up one of his other toddlers moments before Boy 3 had his fingers closed in the door, ran faster than any race horse I’ve ever seen and was there in a split second. He ripped open the door, Boy 3 pulled his fingers out, and dad, out of breath, looked a bit panicked.
“If his finger isn’t broken, he’s fine,” the mom said in passing on her way to pick up Boy 1, who was crying because he couldn’t get the hoola-hoop to work. Did I mention that these boys were 20 months old? (I eventually asked).
The wife, a tall, thin, attractive mom (who wouldn’t stay thin with so many boys running around all the time!?), started chasing Boy 2 to the area where I was now sitting with my two boys.
“Mommy!” another boy said to her. That was not the voice of an almost two-year old, I thought, and sure enough, it wasn’t. It was yet another boy, this one around the age of 4. Hers too. We exchanged glances. Hers said, Yep, he’s mine, too. And mine say, holy crap, he’s yours too?! Our exchanged glances spoke volumes. This woman does not have time to talk!
A second later, Boy 1 was screaming because his fingers were now stuck in the same door that Boy 3 had stuck his fingers in. Two of the four children were screaming. I bet that’s statistically correct. Seems like the odds would be against the parents at all times, right? How can four children be peaceful at the same time?
“It’s time to go,” the mom finally said when all four kids were going nuts. They were clearly tired or hungry or both. But sheesh…how do you even keep track of that many kids? It was almost closing time, and there weren’t very many of us left out there. But when they left, seems like the place just shut down. They’re a troop, a little army! An adorable army, but a loud and demanding one (understandably! How is it even humanely possible for two humans to give four humans everything they need every time they need it??)
When the parents finally corralled them all outside and stuffed them (screaming and crying) into their van, I sighed a sigh of relief for them. I think we all did. All the moms were looking at each other, sympathetically, of course. We were all thinking the same thing. How do they survive all of that without going insane? I finally said, out loud, to a nice enough looking man who was there watching his daughter play, “Wow, can you imagine?”
“No, I can’t,” he said, sighing the same sigh of relief (or so I thought).
“But that woman is just as terrible as all four of those children are when they’re at their worse,” he said.
I literally had no idea what he said. I could not comprehend his comment whatsoever. Is he a woman hater? Does he have some strew of crazy ex-wives that have tainted his view of women? No matter what, the comment was uncalled for and, well, just confusing!! Did he really just say that? Did I misunderstand? Was he implying that this mom, who he doesn’t know AT ALL, is as crazy as four boys under the age of 4 – COMBINED? Who gave him the right to that opinion? Who is he to make such a statement?
I know I heard him correctly…I’m just trying to comprehend it. This mom, who kept her cool under the pressure of every single person in that play area staring at her during the madness, deserves to be talked about that way? NO! This mom, who has three children pooping their pants, who (previously) fed three crying babies with TWO boobs, who probably hasn’t slept in two years and does it all with a smile on her face, should be referred to as a woman crazier than a set of triplets? NO! I could go on and on. Some people…the nerve…urgh!!